What Becomes Possible When You Live From Identity, Not Your Role

Posted: February 13, 2026 in leadership, Life Lessons
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Gatewood Coaching & Consulting | We help leaders grow, strengthen organizational health, and improve performance through coaching, training, and tailored consulting solutions.

Many Leaders Are Living From the Outside In

What if the reason you feel stretched, restless, or quietly exhausted isn’t your schedule… but where you’re living from?

Most of us have learned to live through our roles.

Husband.
Wife.
Pastor.
Executive.
Entrepreneur.
Parent.
Leader.

Roles matter. They carry responsibility. They shape how we serve.

But when your role becomes the place your identity starts, your world quietly narrows.

You begin measuring yourself by performance instead of formation. You start protecting your title instead of growing your character. You feel responsible for outcomes that were never meant to define you.

And without realizing it, you begin living from the outside in.

But what becomes possible when you live from identity instead?

You Lead Without Proving

When your identity is rooted in who God says you are, you no longer need your role to validate you.

You can lead without needing applause.
You can correct without feeling threatened.
You can admit you were wrong without feeling diminished.

Leadership becomes stewardship, not self-preservation.

In marriage, that means you can love without defending your ego.
At work, that means you can make decisions without fear of how they make you look.

You are no longer protecting a title. You are expressing a calling.

You Grow Without Fear

If your role defines you, growth feels risky. Because growth requires admitting you don’t know something yet.

But when identity is secure, growth becomes natural.

You can ask for help.
You can receive correction.
You can confront blind spots.
You can evolve without feeling like you’re losing yourself.

That is true in leadership and in marriage.

Our mission in WE3 is to equip husbands and wives to heal, grow, and lead well at home. But you cannot grow well at home if your identity is fragile. You cannot heal if you are constantly defending a role.

Healing begins when you no longer confuse who you are with what you do.

You Carry Responsibility Without Being Crushed By It

Roles carry weight. That will never change.

But when your identity is secure, the weight does not define you.

You can carry responsibility without absorbing it into your worth.
You can lead through conflict without questioning who you are.
You can endure seasons of uncertainty without losing yourself.

Instead of saying, “If this fails, I fail,” you begin to say, “I am responsible for obedience, not outcomes.” You remain focused on planting the right seeds and watering them when necessary and then trust that God will bring the increase.

That shift changes everything.

You Experience Freedom in Marriage

When a husband believes his identity is “provider,” financial strain becomes personal failure.

When a wife believes her identity is “caretaker,” exhaustion feels like weakness.

But when you both understand who you are in Christ first, your roles become expressions, not prisons.

You can support one another instead of compete.
You can apologize without shame.
You can grow without fear of losing ground.

You Heal.
You Grow.
You Lead.

That order only works when identity is rooted deeper than role.

You Stop Living Reactively

When your identity is tied to your role, every threat to that role feels urgent.

Criticism feels personal.
Change feels destabilizing.
Transition feels terrifying.

But when identity is anchored in Christ, you gain perspective.

You can pause before reacting.
You can discern before deciding.
You can listen without defending.

You become steady.

And steady leaders build steady homes.

Before What You Do, There Is Who You Are

Before I am an Executive Pastor.
Before I am a consultant.
Before I am a husband or father.

I am a Child of God.

That truth shapes how I think, decide, and relate. My roles matter deeply to me. But they flow from something deeper.

If my role changed tomorrow, my identity would not.

And neither would yours.

What Becomes Possible

When you live from identity instead of role:

You lead from conviction instead of comparison.
You love from security instead of fear.
You grow without shame.
You serve without shrinking.
You rest without guilt.
You decide without panic.

Your life expands.

Not because your responsibilities disappear.
But because they are no longer carrying you.

This Is Not a Departure. It Is Depth.

If you have followed our marriage content through WE3 The Winning Team, this is not a shift away. It is a deeper foundation beneath it.

Marriage thrives when two whole people show up, not two defended roles.

Leadership thrives when identity is settled, not when titles are protected.

This season is about living from who you are first.

Healed.
Growing.
Leading.

At home.
At work.
In ministry.

In every place God has positioned you.

What becomes possible when you live from identity, not your role?

More than you can ask or even think.

Being Busy Will Break You!

Posted: December 17, 2025 in marriage
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CLICK HERE to watch the full episode of WE3 The Winning Team Podcast “Being Busy Will Break You!“

When couples feel near but far, the problem is rarely love. More often, it’s busyness disguised as purpose.

Our time in Miami became an intentional pause, a deliberate reset that exposed a truth WE had to face again. Being busy will break you if you are not careful. It can fracture connection, mute intimacy, and slowly pull your marriage off mission. WE were reminded that proximity does not equal connection. You can share the same space, the same calendar, even the same bed, and still miss each other emotionally.

Busyness creates motion without presence. And constant motion can hide emotional distance for years.

Through rest, prayer, and candid conversations, WE examined the stories WE had been telling ourselves about productivity, success, and doing “good things.” The goal was never a grand gesture. What our marriage needed was a renewed rhythm, fewer distractions, clearer motives, and daily choices that protect connection and shared purpose.

When Busy Becomes a Burden

One of the most sobering realizations was this. Good things can still break you when they are misprioritized.

Careers, parenting, service, and ministry matter, but they cannot replace attention at home. When busyness becomes a badge of honor, it quietly becomes a burden. WE asked ourselves a question that changed everything.

Whose vision are WE building, God’s or our own desires?

God-sized assignments often feel bigger than our capacity. They require faith, patience, and partnership. Personal ambition often feels urgent and self-driven. That distinction helped us reframe productivity as stewardship, not status. WE committed our plans to God, acknowledged seasons where parenting and careers eclipsed connection, and accepted a truth WE had to relearn. Rhythm beats perfect balance. Rhythm adapts to seasons without abandoning the covenant.

From Awareness to Action

Awareness without action does not create change.

WE are rewriting the vision and making it plain, breaking it into daily, weekly, and quarterly practices. WE are preparing to do better time-blocking with no-technology evenings, and committing to phone-free days. WE are working to identify all things that drains our attention, then establish boundaries to protect what mattered most.

Time is one of the rarest resources we have. WE decided to invest it first in our marriage, then in everything else. Whether written on paper or stored digitally, the act of writing clarified motives, strengthened accountability, and gave us a shared map for decision-making. When life pulled us off course, the plan helped bring us back.

Why Rest Is Resistance

Being busy will break you if rest is treated as optional.

Romans 12 challenged us to renew our minds instead of conforming to hustle culture. Matthew 6 reminded us to seek the kingdom first and trust God. That led to countercultural decisions, guilt-free rest, intentional pauses, and saying no to good opportunities to protect the best ones.

Unchecked busyness numbs awareness, dries affection, and can even justify neglect at home under the banner of doing good. Rest restores clarity. It protects intimacy. It strengthens faith. In marriage, rest is not laziness. It is obedience.

The Power of Intentional Pauses

Finally, WE leaned into intentional pauses.

Changing the scenery, whether a beach, a park, or a simple walk, interrupts autopilot and creates space to listen. If you work with your mind, rest with your hands. If you work with your hands, rest with your mind. These moments allow couples to prune distractions, revisit their assignment, and trust that God is ordering their steps.

Connection grows when attention is given, purpose is shared, and plans are prayed over. Presence will always matter more than proximity. A marriage on mission does not thrive by doing more. It thrives by choosing what matters most, together.

CLICK HERE to watch the full episode of WE3 The Winning Team Podcast “Being Busy Will Break You!“

How to Fix Communication in Relationships

Posted: September 15, 2025 in Resources
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WE3 The Winning Team Podcast | Season 2 | Episode 4

Communication is the foundation of every successful marriage, yet it remains one of the most challenging aspects for many couples to master. In our latest episode, How to Fix Communication in Relationships, WE explored the real questions couples are asking about communication and provided practical strategies to transform how partners interact with each other.

The first step to improving communication is adopting a teammate mindset. Too often, couples approach conversations as opponents rather than allies working toward a common goal. This fundamental shift in perspective changes everything about how WE communicate. Good teammates don’t fight each other, don’t focus solely on their own needs, and are willing to do whatever necessary to win together. It’s fascinating how WE understand this concept perfectly in sports or workplace settings but struggle to apply it in our marriages.

Misunderstandings often stem from how WE listen to each other. Active listening requires your full attention…what WE call “listening with your face.” This means putting down your phone, making eye contact, and being fully present. When misunderstandings occur, rather than repeating the same ineffective explanation, try asking clarifying questions: “What did you hear me say?” or “Let me understand what you meant by that.” The goal isn’t to be right but to achieve clarity and understanding.

Scripture provides excellent guidance for communication: “Let every person be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). Notice it says “every person”, not just your spouse. This responsibility falls on both partners. Creating space for reflection between responses allows for processing time, especially for those who need to think deeply about what was said before responding.

Passive-aggressive behavior indirectly expressing negative feelings instead of addressing them openly creates unnecessary tension in relationships. This pattern often emerges when couples haven’t identified aligned goals for their conversations. When you notice passive-aggressive responses (saying “I’m fine” while actions clearly indicate otherwise), avoid assuming negative motives. Instead, create a safe space for honest discussion when your partner is ready: “I can see you’re not okay right now, but I’m here when you want to talk about it.”

Timing plays a crucial role in effective communication. Having serious conversations during inappropriate moments (like during an important game or when distracted) sets the interaction up for failure. Choose moments when both partners can be fully present and engaged. Sometimes this means scheduling conversations for later rather than demanding immediate attention.

WE‘ve found several practical tools that have transformed our own marriage communication.

  • 1) Promote active listening by hearing first and responding later.
  • 2) Gently name passive-aggressive patterns to prevent resentment from building.
  • 3) Choose safe timing for tough conversations by preparing the environment and ensuring privacy.
  • 4) Use deep connection prompts like “How can I support you?” that demonstrate you see, hear, and value your spouse.
  • 5) Regularly ask “How can I help?” a simple question that reinforces your commitment to being on the same team.

Communication is not a one-time fix but an ongoing practice that requires daily attention. With intentionality and these practical tools, couples can transform their conversations from potential battlegrounds into opportunities for deeper connection. Remember, you’re not just communicating – you’re building a winning team where both partners feel understood, valued, and supported.

For more, check out the entire episode below. This is only part 1. We had audio issues so will release part 2 very soon, where we will answer the final three questions.

Why is Communication So Hard In Marriage?

Posted: June 23, 2025 in Life Lessons, marriage
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Why is communication so hard in marriage?
Want tips on how to improve YOUR SPOUSES communication? Go grab your spouse & CLICK IMAGE to watch the full episode together.

Communication stands as one of the most fundamental pillars of a successful marriage, yet it remains one of the greatest challenges couples face. Why is something so essential simultaneously so difficult? This paradox exists because true communication extends far beyond merely exchanging words…it’s about creating connection, understanding, and safety.

Many couples operate under the illusion that communication is happening simply because words are being exchanged. However, research shows that only 7% of what WE communicate comes from our actual words…the remaining 93% stems from our tone and body language. This highlights why so many marriages struggle with miscommunication; spouses may be talking but not truly communicating.

True communication requires active engagement, intention, and attention. It’s the difference between merely hearing words and truly listening to understand. In our digital age, where so much interaction happens through text messages and social media, the absence of tone and body language creates even greater opportunity for misinterpretation and disconnection. WE‘ve become accustomed to superficial exchanges that lack depth, leaving our intimate relationships starved for meaningful connection.

Creating a safe space forms the foundation for effective marital communication. A safe space isn’t just about physical safety, but emotional, mental, and spiritual safety as well. It’s an environment where both partners feel free to express fears, needs, and failures without judgment. They feel accepted rather than expected to be perfect, and covered with grace rather than criticism. The challenge is that many people don’t recognize what a safe space truly is, making it impossible to create one for their spouse.

Unhealed trauma significantly impacts our ability to communicate effectively in marriage. Trauma doesn’t just alter how WE feel…it rewires our brain to detect threats even in peaceful situations. This explains why some individuals create chaos even when surrounded by calm; they’ve become accustomed to turbulence. Even when a spouse genuinely offers safety, a traumatized heart might still perceive danger, creating a significant communication barrier that has nothing to do with the words being exchanged.

Our heart condition directly influences our communication style. Scripture reminds us that “a good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart… for the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Luke 6:45). Before blaming communication problems on your spouse, examine what’s in your own heart. Are you harboring resentment, unforgiveness, or pride? These internal issues will inevitably surface in your communication patterns.

Pride presents one of the greatest obstacles to effective communication. When being right becomes more important than being understood; when winning arguments takes precedence over resolving conflicts; partnership becomes impossible. Especially in Christian marriages, pride often masquerades as self-righteousness, turning what should be collaboration into competition.

Interestingly, many couples exhibit more patience and effort communicating with strangers than with their own spouses. Consider how attentively you would listen to someone speaking a different language…the focus, patience, and determination to understand. Yet with our spouses, WE often multitask, half-listen, or prepare our rebuttals instead of truly seeking to understand.

For those preparing for marriage, recognize that communication skills aren’t automatic, they require continuous development. Don’t assume love equals understanding, pay attention to how you handle conflict, ensure you share values and vision, practice vulnerability, seek healthy role models, and discuss how you’ll handle disagreements before they arise.

The journey toward better communication is ongoing, requiring daily commitment regardless of feelings. The good news is that with intentional effort, couples can develop deeper understanding, greater intimacy, and more effective conflict resolution skills that strengthen their marriage over a lifetime.

Want tips on how to improve YOUR SPOUSES communication? Click below, tag your spouse and watch the full episode together. Subscribe, Like & Share!

Marriage Myths Exposed!

Posted: April 4, 2025 in marriage
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In today’s culture, WE‘re bombarded with idealized versions of love and marriage through media, movies, and music. These romantic notions create expectations that often lead to disappointment when real relationships don’t match these fairytales. On the latest episode of WE3 The Winning Team Podcast, WE explored three prevalent myths about relationships that can actually hinder your journey to a healthy, lasting marriage.

The first myth WE tackled was “opposites attract.” This widely accepted belief suggests that people who are fundamentally different naturally gravitate toward each other, creating an exciting dynamic. While initial chemistry between different personalities can feel thrilling—like when an introvert meets an extrovert or a spontaneous person connects with someone structured—these differences often become sources of conflict over time. What matters more than surface-level differences are shared core values, goals, and communication styles. A relationship built on complementary strengths can work beautifully, but when foundational values differ dramatically, the relationship faces constant friction. Remember: compatibility isn’t about being identical, but about having the temperament and personality to navigate life together effectively.

The second myth WE explored was the concept of “soulmates”—the idea that there’s one perfect person divinely created just for you. This notion creates unrealistic expectations about relationships being effortless and magical. When relationships require work (as they all do), people questioning whether they truly found their “soulmate” might abandon potentially wonderful partnerships. From a biblical perspective, Scripture doesn’t teach the concept of predetermined soulmates, but rather emphasizes choosing a Godly spouse and building a strong marriage based on biblical principles of being like Jesus. The logical problem with soulmates is clear: if there’s only one perfect match for each person, what happens when someone marries the “wrong” person? Would everyone else in the chain of relationships be doomed to mismatches? Real love isn’t about finding a mythical perfect match—it’s about commitment, acceptance, and creating safety for each other to grow authentically.

Perhaps the most pervasive myth is “love at first sight.” This romantic notion suggests that true love can be recognized instantly, but this confuses intense attraction with genuine love. That first “spark” is actually just dopamine flooding your brain, creating intense emotions that feel significant. But biblical love—patient, kind, not easily angered—cannot exist without shared experiences and time. How can you know if someone is patient if you’ve never seen them tested? How can you know they’re kind if you haven’t witnessed their response to others in various situations? People who constantly chase this feeling become “dopamine hunters,” abandoning relationships when the initial intensity fades, rather than putting in the work needed for lasting connection.

The biblical perspective offers a healthier framework. Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” There’s an important distinction between “finding” and “searching.” Searching implies striving or desperation, while finding suggests discovery while walking in your purpose. Just as Adam didn’t frantically search for Eve but was doing his purpose when God brought her to him, men should focus on seeking God first, developing character and purpose, and being in the right spiritual place. Similarly, women should position themselves by focusing on their relationship with God, developing godly character, and being in environments aligned with their values.

CLICK HERE to watch episode two, to gain more insights on each myth. Also, we included a list of thought provoking questions that you can answer for yourself or ask your partner to get to know more about how they feel about you and your relationship.

Eugene & LaTanya Gatewood | WE3 The Winning Team

You Want a Marriage or a Wedding? The Why Behind the Ring!

Posted: March 3, 2025 in marriage
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Marriage is often regarded as a milestone in life, meticulously planned, and celebrated. However, beyond the wedding day itself lies a multitude of conversations that should precede this monumental commitment. In the latest episode of our podcast, WE explore the multi-layered question, “Why do you want to get married”? It’s a question that extends beyond romantic notions of love and companionship; it’s about preparing for a lifetime of partnership, collaboration, and shared growth. In a society where the marriage rate is declining, and divorce rates hover around 50%, understanding the motivations and expectations behind marriage is more critical than ever.

Season 2 | Episode 1 – WE3 The Winning Team Podcast (click to view)

The episode opens with a powerful discourse on the purpose of a Christ-centered marriage. WE emphasize that if individuals are striving to emulate the qualities found in Christ, then the union itself will likely reflect those attributes. WE remind you that a marriage built on mutual faith and shared aspirations is more likely to withstand challenges. It’s about both partners focusing on elevating one another spiritually, rather than merely fulfilling traditional gender roles.

As the conversation unfolds, WE delve into the pros & cons of various motivations people have for getting married, such as:

  • Companionship & Intimacy: Finding a lifelong partner for emotional support, companionship, and intimacy.
  • Starting a Family: Building a family and raising children together.
  • Social Status & Tradition: Fulfilling societal expectations and adhering to traditional norms.
  • Financial Stability: Sharing financial responsibilities, pooling resources, and increasing financial security.
  • Legal and Social Benefits: Gaining legal rights and benefits, such as inheritance rights, healthcare benefits, and tax advantages.
  • Sense of Security and Stability: Finding a stable and secure partner for long-term companionship and emotional support.
  • Deepening Love and Commitment: Formalizing a committed relationship and expressing a lifelong commitment to one’s partner.
  • Building a Shared Life: Creating a shared home, building a life together, and experiencing life’s joys and challenges side-by-side.
  • Creating a Legacy: Building a family and passing on values and traditions to future generations.
  • Personal Growth: Learning, growing, and evolving as individuals within the context of a committed relationship.

Our discussion revealed that many individuals may feel the urge to get married simply because of the expectations placed upon them by family or cultural norms rather than an authentic desire to build a life together.

WE assert that each couple’s needs and desires are unique, and thus, they should not feel confined to follow a blueprint defined by societal expectations. Instead, WE propose several reflective questions aimed at encouraging individuals to think critically about their own motivations, such as “Did you like yourself as a child?” and “How did you learn to adjust to the differences in your partner without losing who you are?” These questions serve as prompts for deeper introspection, ultimately leading to stronger foundations within marriages.

Interdependence versus independence also comes under scrutiny as the hosts discuss common narratives surrounding independence, especially among women. The pressure to maintain individual autonomy while navigating a partnership is acknowledged as a significant challenge for many couples. However, the episode presents an alternative view—that true interdependence can lead to mutual growth and support. WE propose that understanding the importance of a balanced dynamic can foster healthier relationships, reminding you that, ultimately, vulnerability and open communication are essential to maintaining emotional intimacy.

In sharing insights from our own marriage, WE highlight that interdependence does not imply codependence; rather, it encourages partners to thrive together while embracing their individuality. This engaging dialogue ultimately sets the stage for the ongoing season, inviting you to engage and reflect on your paths toward marriage and relationships.

You are left with the challenge to reflect on your motivations for marriage, while also being encouraged to engage positively with season one of our podcast. As WE wrap up the episode, WE were clear on our mission: to initiate conversations that allow couples to explore the depths of their relationship, leading to more informed decisions when it comes to the sacred institution of marriage.

Please subscribe, share and like our YouTube Page or subscribe anywhere you podcast.

We appreciate your support!

Host
Eugene Gatewood
– Website – https://eugenegatewood.com
– YouTube: @Original_Mentor 
– Facebook: @Eugene.Gatewood
– Instagram: @Original_Mentor 
-TikTok: @elgatewood

LaTanya Gatewood
– Facebook: @LaTanya.Gatewood
– Instagram: @reddingl

Podcast Music by Micah Gatewood

Stayin’ Married…When Life be Lifin’

Posted: July 8, 2024 in Resources
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Marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs, and navigating it through chronic illness and busy lives can be particularly challenging. Episode 10 of the WE3 The Winning Team Podcast, “Staying Married…When Life Be Lifin’,” (click to watch / listen), delves into the complexities of maintaining a strong, loving relationship amidst these trials. This episode is rich with personal reflections, practical advice, and inspiring stories aimed at helping couples stay connected and resilient.

WE begin by reflecting on our journey through the year 2024, celebrating our small victories in personal and financial goals. Despite the challenges, our commitment to regular date nights and enriching Bible studies has deepened our bond. These moments of intentional connection, although not always shared publicly, have been pivotal in keeping our relationship strong. WE discuss our “Money Monday” meetings and the importance of budgeting and seeking multiple income streams, reaffirming our dedication to financial stability.

The episode then shifts to the deeply personal topic of chronic illness and its impact on our marriage. WE share the progression of lung issues from sporadic incidents to persistent health crisis, highlighting the emotional rollercoaster that accompanies such situations. This heartfelt segment emphasizes the strength found in unity and unconditional love. By sharing our evolving perspectives on support and self-reflection, WE aim to offer valuable insights for anyone navigating similar challenges. Rejecting selfish thoughts and staying united in the face of adversity are crucial themes WE explore.

Next, WE reflect in episode 8 & 9 when WE discussed the concept of “drift” in marriage and the importance of intentional communication. Drawing wisdom from Gary Thomas’ “Sacred Marriage,” (Click Here to purchase) WE discuss how shared activities and prioritizing our relationship have fostered deeper intimacy. The COVID-19 pandemic is highlighted as a period that brought us closer together, contrasting with many marriages that struggled due to enforced proximity. WE stress the importance of moving beyond selfish thoughts and working together to support each other through challenging times.

Mutual understanding, respect, and grace are essential components of a strong marriage. WE explore how shared activities like our daily Walk and Worship have deepened our intimacy and open communication. Reflecting on insights from “Sacred Marriage,” WE emphasize the importance of understanding and respecting one another to achieve unconditional love. Acknowledging each other’s daily challenges and supporting one another’s growth are vital to maintaining a healthy relationship.

Maintaining priorities and balance in life and marriage, especially during busy and challenging seasons, is another key topic. WE discuss the importance of a dynamic strategic plan for personal growth, spiritual closeness, and marital solidity. By writing down our vision and goals, WE can revisit and adjust them as needed to stay on track. Open communication, self-reflection, and mutual respect are crucial practices that help ensure our relationship remains strong and connected.

Episode 10 also touches on the deep and enduring connection within a marriage rooted in spiritual growth and unconditional love. WE share personal anecdotes and insights, illustrating how our faith and mutual support have helped us navigate challenges and celebrate blessings. Lighthearted moments add humor and relatability, highlighting the joy of growing together in love.

In conclusion, episode 10 is a testament to the enduring power of love, faith, and support in marriage. WE invite listeners to subscribe, share, and engage with our community as we continue this journey together. The insights and stories shared in this episode are not just about surviving marriage through illness and busy lives but thriving and finding strength in each other. Until next time, peace.


Eugene Gatewood

LaTanya Gatewood

  • Facebook: @LaTanya.Gatewood
  • Instagram: @reddingl

Podcast Music by Micah Gatewood

Grow Together or Drift Apart (Part 1)

Posted: April 26, 2024 in Resources
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In the sphere of marriage, the journey from “I do” to “WE still do” is often one paved with trials, tribulations, and triumphs.

In part 1 of our latest podcast episodes, WE, candidly share our experiences and revelations from the “A Weekend to Remember” Marriage Retreat. WE discussed our reflections from the marriage retreat, but with a deeper exploration of the dynamics that sustain and enrich long-term relationships, specifically marriage.

WE emphasized the significance of investing time and effort into a marriage (with a few funny stories to support), an investment that is often underestimated but is as crucial as any other aspect of life requiring attention and care.

“Maintenance is better than repair!”

WE draw a compelling parallel between maintaining the health of a vehicle through regular servicing and the necessity of nurturing a marriage to prevent breakdowns. Just as a car needs its oil changed and tires rotated, a marriage requires regular emotional and communicative maintenance to remain robust and vibrant.

As the dialogue unfolds, WE delve into the delicate balance of oneness and isolation in marriage, particularly through the lens of a Christian perspective.

WE dissect the societal pressures that advocate for individualism and how these can insidiously create a chasm between partners, despite their best intentions. The discussion underscores the fine line between healthy individuality and detrimental separation within the marital context, highlighting the importance of shared experiences that fortify the connection between spouses.

Further into the episode, WE explore the intricate dance of transparent communication. WE introduce listeners to a five-level model of sharing within a relationship, ranging from superficial cliches to the profound transparency that is the hallmark of a deeply connected couple.

5 LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION:

  • Cliche: Sharing surface conversation and small talk
  • Fact: Merely sharing what happen throughout your day
  • Opinion: Expressing what you think about what’s happening in your day and in the relationship.
  • Emotion: Conveying how what’s happening in life and/or your relationship is making you feel.
  • Transparency: Being vulnerable to share who you are with a willingness to understand one another.

WE recount personal struggles with communication barriers, including Eugene’s journey from emotional stonewalling to openness and LaTanya’s challenges with self-regulation. Through introspection and humility, WE illustrate how overcoming these hurdles has led to a more authentic and fulfilling partnership. You Can Do It Too!

WE share stories to demonstrate how couples can work together to maintain unity and prevent drifting apart.

Marriage is Hard, But Its Work It!

Concluding the episode, WE remind listeners that while marriage is hard work, it is indeed worth every effort. WE share our excitement to delve deeper into God’s model for marriage and WE encourage you to engage in a dialogue about the joys and challenges of matrimony.

The commitment to grow together is a choice that offers endless rewards. WE urge you to continually invest in your relationship.

This episode truly expresses how our marriage is a testament to the fact that the flame of love can burn brightly, even after decades of togetherness, with the right blend of intentionality, understanding, and dedication.

Navigating the Dating Game: Insights, Challenges, and Christian Perspectives on Relationships

Posted: March 27, 2024 in marriage
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Episode 4 | The Dating Game…

In this episode of the WE3 The Winning Team Podcast, WE dive into the complex and ever-evolving world of dating and relationships, specifically from a Christian perspective. As a married couple for over two decades, WE share personal anecdotes, experiences, and the wisdom WE‘ve gathered along our journey.

One of the most significant changes WE explore is the influence of technology on the dating scene. The rise of dating apps has undeniably revolutionized how people connect and find potential partners. While these platforms have their advantages, like streamlining the process and allowing people to filter through potential matches based on preferences, they also come with a set of challenges. The issue of authenticity in the digital age is a recurring theme in our discussion, emphasizing how people often project an idealized version of themselves online, which may not always align with reality.

Another aspect of modern dating that we discuss is the idea of having a list of expectations for a potential partner. While having standards is crucial, it’s equally important to be open-minded and not too quick to dismiss someone who doesn’t tick every box on your list. Sometimes, focusing too much on the list can make you miss out on someone who could be a great fit for you in ways you hadn’t considered.

Dating as a Christian in today’s society also brings its unique set of challenges. The conflicting messages in culture and the pressure to prioritize external success over finding a partner can make the dating landscape even more complex for Christians. In our conversation, we emphasize the need to change the narrative, stressing that God did not create us to be alone.

A significant portion of our discussion also revolves around the importance of self-love and self-awareness in relationships. Before entering a relationship, it’s crucial to understand who you are, what you want, and what you can offer. It’s about acknowledging that your identity shouldn’t be defined by your partner, and the attraction should go beyond physical appearance.

Finally, WE wrap up the episode by discussing the responsibility of choosing the right partner. The purpose of dating should be to truly get to know someone, observing how they react in various situations rather than focusing solely on their qualities. 

To sum up, navigating the world of dating and relationships requires a combination of self-awareness, patience, and a clear understanding of your values and expectations. It’s a journey that can be complex and challenging, but with the right mindset and approach, it can lead to a fulfilling and rewarding relationship.

To add a pinch of humor, WE also share a quirky habit that still annoys us after two decades of married bliss. 

Tune in for this enriching conversation on dating and relationships; you might find a new perspective on finding ‘the one’.

Watch This Episode & Subscribe on our YouTube Channel

Helping Couples WIN as a TEAM!

Posted: March 11, 2024 in marriage
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WE3 The Winning Team Podcast, Eugene & LaTanya Gatewood.

WE3 | WhenEver, WhereEver, WhatEver…I Love You!

What does WE3 mean anyway? So many people ask! As Christians, WE understand that without God being at the center of our relationship, WE would not have lasted over 20 years. Jesus (1)…Her (2)…Me (3)! WE3!

A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken. – Ecclesiastes 4:12 NLT

“I Love You!” is also an over used phrase in the world and has lost its meaning. WE wanted another way of saying it that means something to us. R&B/Soul singer Maxwell is one of our favorite artist. He has a song called, Whenever, Wherever, Whatever, that WE believe represented how we feel about one another.

Helping Couples Work Together To WIN At This Game Called Life

The wife and I love love and are passionate about marriage. With divorce rates remaining at 50% and us crossing two decades married, several couples inquire about our secret to our longevity. For us, it’s not a secret and WE will stand on the roof top to let everyone know.

Simply put…I LIKE HER & SHE LIKES ME!

We are friends who fell in love almost 30 years ago; who evolved as individuals and preserved through the challenges of life….TOGETHER!

WE love each other in spite of our differences and challenges. WE have cared enough to want to know who WE were beyond the honry-moon phase of our relationship. YEP…I said it, HORNY-MOON! :-). WE praise God for our growth and maturity.

WE will not go into details, you can listen to WE3 The Winning Team Podcast to learn more about our journey and how we made it through.

Episode 2 | The Power of Friendship

In the second episode of the WE3 The Winning Team Podcast, WE share reflections on their 21-year journey of partnership. WE candidly discusses their wins, missteps, and the lessons they’ve gleaned from their shared life. 

This episode is not just about recounting their experiences; it’s about initiating a dialogue about the right expectations and informed decisions that go into a lifelong commitment like marriage. WE delve into the concept of submission in marriage and discuss how their expectations have evolved over the years.

WE highlight the importance of having a common goal in a marriage. WE argue that while individual tasks within a marriage may differ, they work together to complement each other, contributing to a harmonious and successful partnership. WE emphasize the importance of figuring out how to form a team and create a common goal, thereby underlining the significance of partnership and cooperation in a marriage.

One crucial aspect WE touch upon is the importance of building a friendship before entering a marriage. WE believe that this foundation can be the bedrock of a successful union. It is this friendship that can help a couple stay focused on their common goals. Additionally, it is the recognition and expression of individual feelings that can bring a couple closer together.

In discussing the intricacies of a long-term matrimonial bond, WE also share their process of self-discovery. WE discuss how WE have evolved as individuals while staying committed to our common goal(s). WE share how WE have managed to navigate the complexities of maintaining individuality while working towards a shared objective.

This episode serves as a valuable guide for those who are married, considering marriage, or aspiring to marry someday. Whether you are single, engaged, or a veteran in the marriage game, the reflections WE shared can provide valuable insights for your journey.

Lastly, this conversation offers an eye-opening, fresh perspective on marriage. It invites listeners to reflect on their own relationships, encouraging them to understand and appreciate the dynamics of a long-term partnership. It emphasizes the importance of teamwork, understanding, and mutual respect in a marriage, offering invaluable lessons for a successful matrimonial journey.

Eugene & LaTanya Gatewood

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